It hurts. And what’s strange was that, all along, its what i’ve wanted.
and im not sure if im ever doing the right thing.

Its funny how i cried. Im crying because im losing a friend, and i guess this friend is what i call special. I hate the feeling tho, it’s like, im lying to myself. But i’ve been thinking about it so long ago. I told myself, this would all happen, only if we were to spent our time to go out again. And we did. I thought, it was time to tell. and i did. and it definitely seems like it is the right time.

But funny that, it was’nt me who started the ending. All i did was questioning, and It was you who said everything like it was going to end. That definitely reflect, that you sumhow dun bother at all, maybe. But u said, u said, Don’t cry, don’t go. And a part of me wanted to stay. But i tried so hard, and i cant move on. I need to move on. I want to.

I really thought yesterday was fun, and i wanted more of that, but, i don’t think we’ll ever do it again. It just hurt sumtyms to look at you when u left me with all those confusion marks in my head. You need to be in my position to understand myself.

You want to be friends,We can be friends, and that is the reason why im doing all this. i need you to give me some time, to get over you.
And when that day comes, when i can really take you as a friend, and that i’ll never bother about your sweet words.
then i’ll talk to you. you know that.

im really gonna miss you. i do.
im gonna miss everything.
and god knoes, why the hell am i still crying rite now.

jealousy ha-ha

Okay, strange huh im writing this post here?
Well yea, im writing it here because i feel like it should be written here.
So anyways, im writing this down, to pour my feelings out.
Rather than keeping it to myself, i think its best to let it all out here.

Its funny how someone you like, likes err your friend?
Well yea, sometimes you just have to accept it.
And finally, i am accepting it. I swear i am.

Every word she said to me, i take it nicely. She says, i deserve better, well yea everyone’s right. She says, u said all that to me just because, you guys were quarrelling, well i don’t know, maybe she’s right. She says, not to talk to u, its for the best now. well, err, i’ll try to listen to her luh huh. She told me, you said, somethings missing. ouch, ok i understand 😀

But reading her blog every single time, makes me feel so shitty. and jealous of course. ha ha. Sometimes i wonder, is that a hint to tell me every single thing knowing that, im always reading blogs? hahahhaa. okay, maybe i am jealous. i should respect the fact that, its her blog and that she could pin every single thoughts down.

Maybe u’ve realised i have’nt been going online lately. Well yea, u shud know why. It was’nt because, i refuse to go online, just that, i’ve been ignoring you. I don’t wanna talk to you since i know you’ll be giving me false hopes. So i guess its for the best.

People told me, he’s mean hes mean! don’t ever be with him.
But, i always have this thoughts that you could change.

After knowing some stuffs, i came to realised that you’ve changed a lot.
And i don’t wanna like that person anymore.

I’ve always wanted to be friends.
I tried to the other time, but u keep treating me more than that.
So i see no point in being friends anymore.
U’ve hurt me enough.
So for now, today, and the day onwards, i will try not to talk to you anymore.
Let’s just be strangers.

I want to be there.
But, i can’t now.
She’ll be there

i realise i was nobody oso luh.
so why care luh kan?!

😀

crash and burn.

don you get it? i trusted you.

i learn to hate you

So yesterday

i never said that i did’nt need you..

i never said that i did’nt need you..

alistar whitton

Straightjacket Feelings.